Capital D Discussion A constantly longed-for hope and desire
“I love love love *Discussion.* A joy and bliss I try for in every interaction I undertake. Discussion, Capital D Discussion, for me, means a Sharing-of-Understandings.” – Biella Noble
When that Sharing-of-Understanding is Shared with the aim of building a greater Understanding, we get into sublime and magical Discussion. Then More is created. More than the individual alone could achieve. What a fantastic Gift-of-Awareness.
The key, as I see Discussion, lies in setting aside the habit of agreement entirely. And of course also disagreement. It is Understanding that we pursue!
If we take this to heart, we feed back, and repeat back, what is Shared. We Share our take on what is communicated, how we see it. Adding and expanding, focusing and shaping, as Appropriate. This is the glory and wonder of Discussion. A magical exploration of what lies beyond our boundaries. A connection to the unknown, bringing it into our known.
“If we make the effort, and take that fraction of time to *Deliberately* reset our habitual inclination to agree or not, we open the door to immense, even profound value.” – TYM
Wherein lies the benefit really of agreeing or not? Our opinion one way or the other makes little difference. Of course we can say why we agree or not, and that is a step forward. But, what happens if we instead shift to Understanding?
First we look at the original, and try to see the intent behind the expression. We attempt to understand what the originator meant, as opposed to what they said. We are now looking for where that difference may have come in. Or, if it seems they did say what they meant, we look at how it can be that they mean this.
“If another expresses a viewpoint exactly similar to ours, and we feel or believe we understand exactly, how can we be sure?” – TYM
This might seem a simple and obvious question. Of course we are sure, we fully agree. It’s right there, just look at what they said! Now in simple singular points of expression, typically all is as it appears to be. But with more complex expressions, even if we completely agree and feel the originator expressed themselves with thorough clarity, our belief of understanding at this point is still just that, a belief.
Knowing this changes everything. Understanding that we are at this stage merely assuming what the expressor means is a huge Shift-of-Awareness. When we take the next step, which is the step of Verification, we are soon surprised and enlightened. How do we do this?
By Sharing back our Understanding to the original expressor, in our own words! When actually doing this, in actual spoken or written words, doing so outside of the comforts and familiarities of our mind, when doing this in actuality, expressing ourselves, something remarkable occurs. We suddenly realise that what seemed so clear and obvious, is no longer so. Our belief of Understanding is no longer so clear, or obvious. Suddenly we are connected to More.
We connect to previously unseen possibilities. Nuance of maybes that have crept in, now point us to potentialities previously unseen. Our former certain and sure assessments are no longer so dogmatic. We come to see what we assumed, might very well, not be so. Re-expressing back to another is a magnificent exercise of Humility and Discernment.
“Talk *with* me, I thee do implore.” – Fine Noble
We proceed, our Honesty and Integrity now engaged. Determined to check ourselves, we Share back our perceptions and perspectives of what we believe the other said. “As I understand it,” frames our humble offering.
The magic now begins. We might get, “Yes, that is what I meant exactly!” But this is rare, fortunately. But even when this does occur, inevitably, there is an added: “However….” and we are treated to the always present More that was not expressed and included.
Mostly what occurs is the other will find some difference. Typically they will correct a mis-expression by themselves: “What I actually meant there…” The joy comes from our Understanding revealing to the other their own Understanding, revealing the connection between Understanding and Expression. Particularly how the two do not always align as we believe.
Our Share-Back almost always leads to the other connecting more fully to what they expressed. To what they meant to express. But, there is More. Our Perspective, even when purely limited to checking our own Understanding, opens doors. Inevitably we connect to the broader implications, explorations, extensions, and deeper Understandings of the focus at hand. We enter that marvellous land of enlarging and expanding our Awareness.
We can get sophisticated in this refinement of interaction. We can add a TakeAway to our repeat-back. Now we Share what and how we Understood the other, but we add what we took away as Value. We include what was significant, what was meaningful, memorable, stimulating, and otherwise impactful for us.
TakeAway can be even more. We now step fully into Discussion Magic-Land. Adding to our TakeAway, we Share what came up inside, what was pulled from our depths. Whether this is directly or apparently related or not, doesn’t matter. We Share and include in our TakeAway what is elicited from us. Or, sometimes, if the original expression was simple, this is all we Share back, that stimulation of what arose in us. In doing so, what a wondrous door we open.
Especially if we Trust, with Capital T Trust, our personal TakeAway, which might seem wholly un-connected, we now Share with that Trust. Trust in Sharing itself. Proceeding with Trust into the unknown, we Share, and inevitably the remarkable occurs, our Sharing of what surfaced from within us, always connects.
Something inexplicable happens. Somehow, suddenly, we end up on Paths heretofore unseen, heretofore unimagined. If we allow ourselves, if we let loose, and run down these paths, eagerly exploring where they might lead, what they reveal, what they connect us to, what they show us, we dance with wonder. More comes, and More comes from More, and soon we overflow.
“*Discussion,* when unhooked from the limitations of agreement, unbinds us. *Discussion,* when hooked to the infinities of Understanding, becomes a portal into delicious self-expansion.” – Ursula A